Baby steps :)

I think a lot of people I hang out with today would scoff if I said overcoming my shyness is a daily struggle. Even I would lor. I usually seem very chatty and there are even times when I need to be quiet and listen more instead =p

Then there are the times when I want to just live in my own world. I don't want to approach anyone and get to know them. I don't want to think so much about what I say. Or remember what I know about someone. I just want to blend in with the background.

And this is especially so when I'm put in a group of people who are already fast friends.

But then I remember what it takes to make someone feel at home where I am in my element. Even when I'm feeling chatty, it's hard to sustain a conversation with someone who doesn't give me anything to work with. So I step it up. I tell myself to look the person in the eye and ask questions, share stories...be more than just the wallpaper in the room.

And it works the other way too. I remember what it feels like to be on the outside of a group and I get restless when I see someone in the same situation. Even if no one else is doing it, at least I can be one person trying to make that person feel welcomed.

I think (think only la coz..no one will tell me otherwise haha) that if I can just relax, the conversation flows naturally and I have enough friendliness to put a person at ease. But I'm scared though that I'll be over-friendly and scare people instead.

Ahh, I wish I had Moo around more often because she warns me if I do.

On the bright side, I think I've come a long way from the person I was before. I don't crave the solitude as much as before :)